this needs little introduction. the famous jake loden gave a presentation in his class the other day, and i was just so lucky to sit in. which promoted me to think, why do bible college student go NUTS with their presentations?
my only conclusion is they’re subtly hinting to everyone in the room that they’d be a great replacement if the professor ever needed a day off..
proof of jake’s genius can be found below. i hope you enjoy it as much as i did.
“so. you’re living in nazi germany, hiding 300 jews in your 90 square foot basement and the nazis knock on your door… what do you do?”
this is a test my friends. a test of faith. bible college students, especially those veterans looking to initiate the newbies, will test. they will test with circumstances wildly outside of reality in attempt to rock your worldview.
“so, the pope asks you to fight in the holy crusades. what do you do?”
“so, satan knocks on your door and says: ‘here’s the deal. you can go to heaven and everyone else goes to hell, OR everyone in the world can go to heaven and you have to go to hell.’ what do you do?”
so… what do you do?
now, of course these circumstances are unreal and beyond belief, but it’s best to be witty than sorry, that’s the 6MOB motto.
so here’s how to test the faith of your fellow bible college students: Continue Reading…
there is a potential problem that arises at bible college. you learn a lot. i mean a lot. the people who graduate, from legit bible colleges, graduate with a virtual, but not at all real, doctorates degree. seriously, it’s very hard. but, you learn tons. so, win?
now, there is a problem in all of that knowledge. unchecked knowledge tends to breed a bit of pride and, unfortunately, bible college students tend to develop a bit of a complex. thus, needing to overcome said complex, overcompensate a bit.
they’re arrogant. it happens.
bible college students get a bad wrap because of a few sour grapes (which personally i love grapes, especially sour ones, but in this instance, when comparing grapes to idiots, not so much).
so what necessitates at that point is a little gathering we have come to love at EBC as “the rebuke lunch”.
they’re a blast. well, as long as you’re not the one they’ve called the lunch about. but hey, good news, free lunch! our loving faculty and staff see the need, especially right before christmas time or summer, when we all go home, to remind us to not be jerks to our family.
you see, all of the knowledge turns some into jerks. so it becomes necessary for our fearless leaders to say “quit it!”
here are three things you might hear at a rebuke lunch: Continue Reading…
what happens when your teacher leaves town? well, the obvious choice is to cancel class, or grab another professor to teach. but, the more risky choice is find one of your students to teach the class for you. this is a tricky one because you have to pick the right student. once you pick your student, there can only be two roads: the student has to be either brilliantly epic or fail miserably. nothing in the middle. Continue Reading…
for anyone who has taken any kind of bible college counseling class, you know that everything can be blamed on pride. every sin, every misstep leads back to arguably one of the most harmful afflictions, pride.
but that’s not enough for your average bible college student. the vernacular has changed. pride is no longer the scapegoat.
so what’s on the chopping block now? heart issues.
beware of the heart issues. they can sneak up on your without you even knowing it.
not int he mood to sing worship songs? i think that’s a heart issue.
forgot to tithe this week? i think that’s a heart issue.
didn’t turn in your homework? i think that’s a heart issue. Continue Reading…
shout out to eric.
bible college. a place where dream are a flying, plans get made and people prepare for what’s coming next in their lives. it’s an exciting time of dream having, vision casting, and praying. it’s a time where anything can happen, because you have wiped the slate clean when you relocated your education to a bible teaching institution.
i must warn you, it is so easy to stay in that mode. that mode that dictates your life decision in that short time, can last way longer than it ever should. it’s dangerous. there are different seasons in every one’s life, of that there is no doubt, but there are too many “go’s” and “do’s” in the bible for us to sit on our thumbs all day and wait.
the problem is, too many get caught up in desiring to desire. it never goes beyond wanting to dream and wanting an amazing plan for their life.
so, in an oddly practical turn by 6MOB, here is the bible college students guide to do more than desire to desire: Continue Reading…
it’s a sight, not to miss, when a fellow bible college student sneezes in class. it’s a mad race to get the bless you. but, if you were to be a proverbial fly on the wall amidst the world renown race to the sneeze, you would notice something strikingly out of place.
no bless you.
where did the bless you go? no one really knows. i could tell you a tale about an oil barge on the ivory coast many years ago…
but that would be pure fantasy, and for us to take that journey, thus wasting your invaluable six minutes you have offered up to our humble table of thoughts, would be just criminal.
so for the sake of humanity, i beseech you to please refrain from asking the aforementioned favor, of which i would normally give in, and furthermore endorse with the words of my lips, and the platform of this here blog.
but i digress…
what you will find in a biblical academic situation is a barrage of ever so creative, theologically correct race to the answer the one’s sneeze.
“bless you”
“God bless you”
“may the holy spirit continue to transform your life through the process of this bless”
“bless you- and take up your cross!”
there’s no point of application today. just a public service announcement, i do not want you to be surprised.
the one thing bible college students will never do is talk about their fasting. well, when i say that, i mean they will never give you the details. but you’ll know they’re fasting. it will be painfully obvious. but they won’t say a word, because, ya know, it’s not kosher to talk about it.
but, you do have to hand it to bible college students, they get creative with their fasting, and not talking about their fasting. i know a certain someone who is getting ready to fast from their iphone for two months, but that person would never say it, because that’s just not how it’s done. but, that person will get very creative when it comes to letting people not know about it.
they will go to great lengths to avoid talking about it. say, for example, this person who is fasting from their iphone, will avoid all topics of technology or the iphone. OR they will swing drastically to the other end of the scale and ONLY talk about the iphone and how it fills some magical hole in people’s lives, especially theirs, thus the need for giving it up for some time presents itself.
it’s probably someone else who brings it up: “hey, maybe it’s time we take a break from our iphones?” and the other person enthusiastically jumps in and agrees. after all, it was their plan all along, right?
solidarity.
bible college students not only get creative with what to fast, and how to not talk about it, but they are just so cunning, how they get others to jump on their food-less, iphone-lacking band wagon. because, if you get others to follow along, then it’s alright to talk about it. because it’s community. and you can encourage each other. it’s biblical.
so bible college students, get cracking on that fast. get creative, and find some ways to alert others to your holy commitment without actually using your words. after all, it was st. francis of assisi that said “share the gospel where ever you go, and use words if necessary.”
so they you have it, straight from st. francis himself, saying: go forth and fast, and make sure your actions say it all.
we’ve talked about community before, and the effect it can have on a bible college students life and way of thinking, but until right now, we’ve not talked about the implication of their forever changed ecclesiology.
re-neighboring.
by definition, this phenomenon is moving from one neighborhood to another for the sole purpose of building community in that area. there’s something noble about that, no?
but what makes the bible college student different than any other human on the planet, will be a “multiple re-neighboring.” moving from one end of the city to another ten times within a year is not uncommon for these noncommittal theologians. they immerse themselves in the neighborhood, and its culture, and hightail it outta there when they find out another neighborhood is “more legit.”
so how do you find a “more legit” neighborhood? well, luckily you have 6MOB to help you with that decision.
how to find a “more legit” neighborhood:
1. not too many people similar you
it’s important to find a community group, or neighborhood group, that doesn’t have many people like you in it. if you’re a college student, make sure you move to an area with lots of old folks. if you have a family, move to an area where all the singles gravitate. this is important for a “more legit” group. the more people you have different than you, the more bragging rights you gave with your fellow bible college students.
2. close to a school
it’s great if you can back your house up against a school and flood them with service days and projects. the more you can do things for that school, the more leverage you have with getting out of other ministries commitments. “oh, i can’t make it to class today, i’m just so emotionally drained from tutoring 300 students all by myself yesterday… can i have an extension in my paper? i think we’re scrubbing the gym with toothbrushes tomorrow.”
3. no other bible college students in the neighborhood
if there’s any bible college student in your neighborhood, run. it’s important that you are the only college aged person within shouting distance that has any real bible education. if you plan to stay in that group, you can either submit to them, because they were there first, or plot an overthrow.
4. poor families
nothing says “community group outreach” like a bunch of poor families in the neighborhood. if there are any, jackpot! you’re a thriving bible college student in america, and they need your help! …learning the levitical laws.
well bible college students, go out and re-neighbor, again, and check out the criteria for a “more legit” neighborhood before settling for your 2 month stint.
